It feels like yesterday when I had met you. You were deeply engrossed in your work with no interest in the things around you. I remember coming up to you to introduce myself. It was my first day in the team & you just seemed different & aloof, but a good kind of different. My first few thoughts were to get to know you better, to follow you around. I should have thought about quitting then!
I did not even realize that I have fallen for you until the day you went on a long vacation. We were connected through calls and messages. But, I could feel your absence. The coffee breaks and trips to cafeteria looked like mundane activities in your absence. How did I not realize it earlier?
You were always busy with one meeting or another. They said you are a critical resource. Huh, how much I disliked those useless meetings…It took you almost a year to open up to me. That’s when I got to finally know the depth of your soul. You were like an open book then. I knew that your raised eyebrows meant you are in a ‘do-not-disturb’ mode. I sat there watching your every move. Even your breathing patterns were known to me. The heavy sigh after a code failure, the easy breathing once you finished your work for the day. I can recognize these patterns even today.
It’s funny how things do not work out. After a while, I understood your commitment lies in your work. You could not survive being in a relationship. We were good friends, no doubt about it. But I understood that work would always come first for you. It took me sometime to adjust to this idea. And, I eventually did. People say I should I have tried to talk you out of the workaholic mode. I should have stayed for long & given you a chance. I should not have quit so early. My heart knows that what I did is right. After so many years, I can see you are happy with the position you hold. Still not committed to anyone else except your work.
Did I make a wrong choice? Would things be different today if I had stayed? Am I quitter? – We all may have different answers to the above questions. The important thing is to do what your heart feels is right! 🙂
P.S. – This post does not bear any resemblance to real life events & is a figment of my imagination. 🙂
“Mother of mine you gave to me, all of my life to do as I please,
I owe everything I have to you,
Mother sweet mother of mine.” – Neil Reid
Mothers are compassionate creatures whom God made as he could not be everywhere. They are made up of hugs, cuddle, kisses and lots of love. You may roam around the world but still crave for food prepared by your mom. And, I am not the only one who feels so!
Our moms have secret systems by which they understand just on hearing our voices. How do you do it Maa? You have the patience levels which I find impossible to obtain. Taking care of things big or small, is never a child’s play for you.
We may grow old and have kids of our own. Still our mothers never seize to amaze us. I might never say the exact words that I love you Mom, but you know we do! Only a mother’s heart can comprehend it.
Thank you for all you did & continue to do! Love you Maa 😉
I think I have found love. Cupid has struck me for the first time & I am ecstatic. My heart flutters at your mere sight. I am at loss of words whenever I am around you. Remember the first day I saw you in class and had stumbled. Your charm had impressed me then and there.
I am hypnotized whenever you pass by me smiling! The way you take my side & care for me…Depth of your eyes & the intoxicating voice…There are butterflies in my stomach and I am too shy to acknowledge it. I am waiting for Valentine’s Day when I would propose you or even you can do that 😉
Yesterday in the music room when we were singing duet my heart was racing. How could you not hear my heartbeats? Maybe you are just trying to be subtle about it. Today everyone in the class was teasing us. Is it just me? Don’t you feel the same? I hope you do.
We already have great chemistry and things would only get rolling. I am hoping after the school ends in two years we would go to the same college. And can stay together there too 🙂
Good Night Diary! Time for dreams…
I am sure you would have also felt same on your first crush. When as a kid you get this happy feeling and the world resolves around just one person. How did you meet your first crush? Was it a friend or an actor? Do share your stories would love to hear them!
Direction is one of the most controversial words from the English vocabulary. Whole life we are bombarded with questions like – what direction is your life going? What direction is the career going? After all, why do we even need so many questions. Irony of my life is that my name also means direction! People joke about my name, that I would have all the directions sorted out for myself. Alas, if only I can tell them that not the case. Exactly like this blog post which might sound directionless to you. But for me I am writing out my heart.
Our lives direction was predetermined even when we were kids. Get admitted in kindergarten, move up the classes, give board exams, get into a good college, have a career…Phew, see the whole life has to have a direction. I want to break free from this routine. Sometime out of my own life where I can flow in any direction I want. Is this too much to ask?
There comes a time in everyone’s life which is full of uncertainties. Things do not move as you plan. Introspect and find the purpose of your life. You may be headed in the wrong direction. But it’s never too late to change it!
Do share your thoughts and let me know if you believe in having a fixed direction in life or like to go with the flow…
Cancer is a life-threatening disease which results from abnormal growth of cells. It affects different people in different ways. Whatever be the case, the person suffers – both physically and mentally. Family and friends around the person also feel the same pain. Seeing your loved ones go through the treatment is hard.
Just today morning I had read the story of a kid who underwent the cancer treatment on Humans of New York page on Facebook. Each story that I read or hear has a common connection – the fear of unknown & the faith to get better.
I understand your pain. Every needle that pierced you equally pierced my heart. You were the one going through treatment & I was as anxious as you. Awaiting the scan results was miserable. Each day had new anxiety levels. Your eyes conveyed the feelings which the words could not. A visit to doctor was never so scary. Let’s just say I also never want to visit hospitals ever again for a lifetime.
Only you can determine the extent of your pain. You have been through it & no one can ever fully comprehend how you feel. But, never forget that you have your family & friends to support you whenever you need us. It’s not your battle alone to fight. We are all in this together & will sail through it. God’s grace has helped us throughout these tough times. And the worst is over!
The future holds all good things for you. Please do not let go of who you were. The zest for life that you have should stay till eternity. Think of it as a cloud with silver lining. Remember your dreams & aspirations and live for them with a new passion. Afterall, there are so many things left to try!
– Love you loads ! 🙂
P.S. – This post is dedicated to all those who are going through Cancer & their families. It may be tough right now, but this too shall pass.