We recently celebrated our sixth anniversary in October. Looking back, I feel, it’s been lot of time together. But looking at our previous generations, it seems incredibly small amount of time. In these six years of marriage, we have seen many highs and lows and have sailed through them together. Here are six lessons that I have learnt in my married life.
Respect individual’s personality
In marriage, whether arranged or love, there are two people coming to live together forever. It’s rightly said you do not know a person completely, unless you start living with them. Learn to respect your partner’s individuality. Being married does not mean that you sync your lives. I am a nocturnal being, but my spouse is a morning person. We give space to each other and have our separate routines for individual times.
Have a hobby together
Being individuals should not cause you to ignore your relationship. Each relationship takes time and needs to be nurtured. Find some common interest areas which you can enjoy together. It can be simple things like gardening, reading, binge watching or travelling. The time that you both spend together will give you happy memories to relive when you are going through a rough patch.
Even after having kids, keep sometime separate for yourself. Have planned date-nights! For a brief period, we both were in same organization and in same office building. We used to have date lunches on the Friday or share an ice-cream together while returning from office. I miss this proximity, but we still carry on our tradition to spend quality time together.
All that glitters are not gold
Your friend’s timeline is always filled with happy smiley faces on facebook and instagram – the lavish vacations in luxury hotels or the exorbitant amount spent on branded objects. Do not be fooled with everything that you see on social media. We all portray our best to the world and the real life is different from reel life. Each relationship is different and what works for others might not work for you.
Some couples might like high adrenaline rush activities,whereas other prefer staying back at home and cozying under a blanket.
Stay committed to the relationship
There is saying that married couple grow alike the longer that stay together. When you understand people so closely, you might tend to ignore smaller issues. You can take them for granted unintentionally. But, beware of this mistake. It happens with even the best of us. Treat your relationship with your spouse with special feelings. Small gestures can go a long way in marriage!
Talk and Resolve Issues
Let’s be honest, we all have fights. Some can be over trivial issues like a towel not on its right place. 😉
Always talk through about your feelings. If you are hurt, then let the other person know what has hurt you. And, if you are angry, then also let the partner know about it. It does not mean that in anger, you become aggressive and start dominating the other. Both are equal and have equal say. Talk about your issues and come to a resolution.
I do not believe in the saying that never take a fight to the bed. If need be, let it go at the moment and discuss later when both have calmed down. An advice for hangry people, never fight when you are hungry. 🙂
Together you can
This is my most favorite lesson from our time together. We have seen many highs and lows together. Overcoming the cancer treatment, becoming parents or the hurricanes while travelling – we have seen too much together in short time. And, having faith on each other has given us strength. Together we can and we do overcome any obstacle life throws our way. Trust each other and you will be fine! 🙂
These were few lessons that I have learnt in my marriage. And, they hold true for any relation in your life. What our your life lessons from your relationships? Do share with us in comments and let us all learn from each other. 🙂
This post is written as part of #LetsBlogWithPri season 2 hosted by Prisha. You can read Arti’s post about interpreations of child’s poop colors and Seema’s post on happy thoughts affirmations for moms.
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Doctor mommy(10th October 2020 - 12:15)
Your shared some pretty tangible pointers to not only bring back the spark but also maintain it. Because as you rightly elucidated all theat glitters isn’t gold. for a relationship to work, it takes tons of effort by both sides.
Dishki(20th October 2020 - 00:52)
Yes Rahat, both partners need to be equally committed to make it work. Thanks for dropping by.